Chronic Illness Challenge Day 5

How does being chronically ill make you feel?

Well I feel like that is a really serious question and I’m not really sure how to sum up my overall feelings about being chronically ill. I have good days and bad days; I think that they correlate with how bad my pain is on a given day. And it also depends on what else is going on in my life at the time.

Some days I see my chronic illnesses as an annoying hindrance. Some people that I tell actually make a big deal out of it in the wrong way. It’s like once someone knows I’m sick they treat me like I’m incapable of doing anything by myself. It would be ideal to me if I could tell someone that I have chronic illnesses and have them respond with something along the lines of okay thank you for telling me, ask for help if you need it. 

I know that there’s a happy medium between treating people like crap because they have a chronic illness, and trying to do everything for someone. Most days I would say that I’m just generally frustrated with being sick all the time. Being stuck with incurable illnesses really wears you down. It feels like you’re constantly holding your breath. And just hoping that one-day someone will eventually say we may have a potential cure for your illness.

But in a way, I’m kind of happy that I’m chronically ill. If I weren’t sick I feel like my life wouldn’t have as much meaning, like I wouldn’t be as motivated to go out and do things like I am now. I’m strongly motivated to educate people about my illnesses and if I educate one person then that person will go tell others and the information just spreads. And if I weren’t sick I might not have the same friends that I do now and my friends keep me happy, they’re my family. Also if I weren’t chronically ill I might not have the same interests that I have now. If I weren’t chronically ill I might not want to be a nurse and try to help people like I want to.

I feel like people with chronic illnesses shy away from careers in the medical field. Probably because they’re so physically and emotionally demanding. Or that because people with chronic illnesses spend so much time in doctor’s offices and hospitals already, that I feel like people with chronic illnesses might end up getting burnt out faster. But in a way I also feel like people with chronic illnesses would make the perfect nurses and doctors, because we can relate to the patients some of us might have gone through similar things as them. It means a lot more to people if you can really relate to them and not just answer their questions from a clinical standpoint.